As soon as I read this quote from Barry Goldwater, I knew it would be my friend on any type of feedback programme I facilitated and it’s for that reason I’ve also chosen it to represent the ‘P’ in my alphabet quotes.  To me, it shouts out politeness; a virtue and a discipline.

I think people often shy away from having any type of ‘sensitive’ conversation because they think they have to act and behave in certain way to show who’s boss.  In my eyes, conflict is a disagreement that doesn’t have to be sorted out by bracing ourselves, armouring up and jumping in with our extra large wellies on, but best tackled with positive regard for the other person, curiosity about the issue and donning our best listening ears.   We create a much better environment for people to speak more freely and are more likely to build trust and rapport, as well as influence others when we are open to hear all sides of a story, rather than having a ‘my way or the highway’ approach.

So the next time you find yourself in a conversation and start to feel yourself digging your heels in, don’t ignore it.  Recognise it, pause for breath, and start to ask some questions because it’s only by being curious, rather than being right, that you’ll be able to make the right decision.  And even if you don’t both agree with the outcome, you’ll respect the fact that you’ve heard one another’s points of view.