Why asking for help is a leadership strength, not a weakness
Don’t you think this is such a powerful quote from Bill Withers?
It popped it’s head up the other day just after I’d been coaching someone about the importance of asking for help!
Our tendency is to hide our struggles, even when we long for support. I know I carried this burden for many years and styled it out in the best possible way. Because I was always seen as capable, I’d feel that I should automatically know how to approach a new task. I’d see it as a weakness if I needed to ask for help.
Yet if we don’t express our needs, others may not realise we need help, or they might assume we have everything under control.
Vulnerability can feel risky; it opens us up to rejection, judgment, or disappointment. But at the same time, it’s the only way to truly connect and receive what we need.
It’s no good thinking, ‘Well if they knew me well enough they’d realise.’ That’s not how it works. They don’t have a crystal ball and it’s up to us to let them know.
Being open about our needs creates space for understanding, empathy, and genuine connection.
Perhaps, like me, you need to be reminded about how good it feels when someone comes to you to ask for your expertise on a matter in which they’re struggling. We’re all works in progress and can’t expect to know everything, but together we’re better.
So, the next time your Eeyore self-talk kicks in and feels worried about being vulnerable, try some of the following wording to get you going…
🌟 I’m struggling with this project, and wondered if you can help me think through some ideas?
🌟 Do you have time to talk as I can’t get my head around the various elements of this project?
🌟 Your advice really helped me last time and I’d love to gain your perspective again.
Funnily enough when I read this quote again, I think it also reflects the idea that people can only meet us where we allow them to. If we keep walls up, even those with the best intentions can’t step in.
So, it’s not just about being willing to ask for help but also being willing to receive it.
I’d be very interested in your thoughts…